Tuesday, January 31, 2012

Great new running game

This game is not for those who are absolutely opposed to having a possible smashed face.

This game is for those who like an exciting new way to get some good speed work over the course of a 6-10 mile run....and possibly a smashed face.

These are the steps to the game:

A) Figure out what trail you'll be using.

B) Figure out how many miles you'll want to cover.

C) As undesirable as this part may sound; do some math to find out how long you'll need to cover the distance before it gets dark.
Make sure you do the math wrong. Whatever your second grade teacher taught you about addition and subtraction, yep, just throw it out the window.

D) Now here's the fun part: Leave for your run waaaay too late, don't bring a headlamp and race the sun. Try not to stub your toes, trip, fall, break any bones, get impaled on a tree branch, scrape a knee, elbow, hand, wrist, face, or anything not mentioned. If you do happen to trip, which you will, just pretend you're in the Matrix and don't let yourself fall. And if you must fall, do so gracefully, or at least not around anyone. It's just embarrassing.

*note - eating carrots while running WILL NOT help you. In fact, the only thing that will help you is partying til you puke, I mean running til you puke.

There are various ways to play this game, McGlade Meander of Madness, that what I just named it, just now. It works solo best, but play it with a friend too!

If you have no trail at your disposal, don't fret. You CAN play it on the road following the same rules except you must wear all black and follow the mindset from Dodgeball: "if you can dodge a car, you can dodge a ball." Dodging cars is more dangerous than not tripping over rocks and roots but if you must have a road alternative, I suggest just not playing this game at all.

- Don't play this game. It's a bad idea. Trust me. I learned my lesson...even though it was kind of fun.

-- Patrick

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